weconqueratdawn

Why yes, I am unreliable, why do you ask?

2020-03-20T17:43:33Z

Somehow a year has passed and I'm not sure how. I can be a very patchy user of the socials (my social energy varies massively) but this must be a record even for me.

Anyway, current events and all that. It's nice to have an online space which is not smoking with the heat of a frantic stream of updates. And no one on here, to my knowledge, is desperately trying to find a hot take on either the virus or the many crises it's causing, or spreading misinformation, rumours, or conspiracy theories *heavy sigh*.

So now I anticipate checking in a bit more often! The routine of my days and weeks should make it more possible as well - I was writing hell for leather to get a big fic finished, and then I was working like crazy to get myself writing original stuff. Now I've done both of the those things my time should be a bit more balanced (I go a bit crazy if I just write and don't do anything else - sometimes it's necessary but I've learned it's a bad idea for me to keep it up for too long) and I should have some quieter periods where I can keep a little diary going and enjoy reading other people's stuff.

For those interested, here's the fic I mentioned (it's a Quicksilver one):

Fandom: Hannibal (NBC)
Pairing: Hannibal/Will
Title: Not Like You Do
Length: 97k
Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon, Marriage, Shotgun Wedding, Will Finds Out, Will Finds Out Something Anyway, Hannibal Lecter is not the Chesapeake Ripper, Hannibal is Hannibal, Established Relationship, Coming of Age, Memory Palace, Age Difference, Young Will Graham, Genderfluid Will Graham, Nonbinary Character, Angst and Romance, Explicit Sexual Content, Illustrations, Thriller, Gothic Romance
Summary: On summer vacation with Hannibal, Will acts on the spur of the moment and makes a life-changing decision. Not everyone is going to approve but that’s only the start of Will’s problems - how much does he really know about Hannibal and will he live to regret loving him? Set in an AU where Will is a young genderfluid student who began dating Hannibal after they met as part of his studies. Can easily be read as a standalone (though it is technically the final part of a series of shorts).

And here's my Patreon too, where I'll be writing stories (queer erotica, mostly mlm I expect, but who knows?) with the input of patrons:

(If you're not sure what Patreon is, it's an easy way for me to share my writing with the people who are most interested in it. Patrons pay a monthly amount to access my posts and stories, starting from $1, which means I get direct support for my writing and publishing goals. There's a tiny explainer here.)

So that's my little update - hope you all are as safe and comfortable as possible xx

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Fic: Heatwave, Will/Hannibal (Quicksilver AU)

2019-04-21T14:39:01Z

A surprise thing for the @hannibalcreative #JustFuckMeUp fest!! And something I never thought I’d do! I wrote A/B/O for Quicksilver :0

(For anyone who doesn't know me that well, here's a quick primer - Quicksilver is a Hannigram AU I've been working on with my good friend TheSeaVoices for about 3 years now, where Will is young and genderfluid. It wasn't supposed to be this long-running but it rather got away from *guilty look* - Will has quite the voice and I'm unbelievably weak for it. I'm working on a long multi-chapter fic to round off the series properly).

Heatwave ~ a Quicksilver A/B/O AU, now on AO3

Rating: Explicit

Words: 10k

Tags: Heat/Mating Cycles, Knotting, First Time, Alpha!Will, Omega!Hannibal, Humour, Explicit Sexual Content, Genderfluid Will Graham

Summary: Hannibal stops taking his suppressants without consulting Will. A weekend of hedonism and humour follows - could it lead to an update in relationship status too?

Snippet under the cut and there's art from TheSeaVoices too! Censored version on Insta / Uncensored on AO3

( Read more... )

With a burst of happy anticipation, he took his bag through and stuck his head into the kitchen.

“I’m here,” he said. “Sorry I’m a bit late--Professor Crawford wanted a word.”

Hannibal, of course, had known he’d arrived the second Will had stepped inside his front door. Perhaps even earlier than that. His sense of smell was unusually acute and it had been trained on Will for well over a year. He claimed he could tell which objects Will had touched in his office and in what order; he said Will’s scent left a trail in the air like bright, wind-blown leaves. Will half-believed this, but also suspected him of whipping up romantic fantasies for his own amusement.

“Will.” It was Hannibal’s customary greeting--short, warm, surprisingly intense. He was up to his wrists in a bowl of bright pink meat, minced lamb with spices. It smelled ripe and rich, undercut with lemon and something else Will couldn’t quite place. “And what did Jack want this time?” he said, pinching off a morsel of the mixture and rolling it into a ball.

“Oh, the usual. You know he likes to keep an eye on me.”

“His protégé,” Hannibal said. “Youngest and cleverest in the class.”

Instead of replying, Will gave him a withering look, one Hannibal pretended not to see. He couldn’t speak of Professor Crawford and Will together without a possessiveness creeping into his voice. Anyone listening would assume both him and Professor Crawford were two soap-opera alphas fighting over an omega. Sometimes, Hannibal certainly acted that way.

Will held up his bag. “Just taking this upstairs then I’ll be back down.”

Hannibal’s bedroom was probably Will’s favourite place in the world. It was serene without being lofty and dark without being enclosed. At night, with the lights turned low, it was like being at sea in the gloaming, the white bed a raft drifting on deep, calm waters. Here Hannibal’s scent was strongest. Will allowed himself the indulgence of bending to sniff his pillow. This was the place they slept together, Hannibal tucked into Will’s side, belonging to him and no one else. At times like that, with only the samurai armour to watch over their dreams, the room seemed to be their own private kingdom.

At other times, it seemed so intensely Hannibal it was all Will could do not to break out in laughter. The dressing room, for example. Will’s father had been in the Navy and as a consequence Will knew how to be tidy, especially in a small space and with few belongings. But life had its complications and weeds flourished in the cracks--and if you mixed in exotic blooms too, the effect could be entertaining, or at least until it devolved into a big old mess. Hannibal’s life appeared to have no cracks or weeds, and his dressing room certainly didn’t. It was pristine--a perfect marriage of form and function.

Will had been granted use of some of this hallowed space. Among the racks of colour-coded suits hung a small selection of evening wear--a smattering of feminine tailoring and a single shift dress Will hadn’t quite found the courage to wear out. His dress choices would have been more palatable to the opera-loving public if only he’d had the good sense to have been born an omega. But there wasn’t much he could do about that, and neither was he inclined to waste time struggling to conform to their stuffy, outmoded views. Hannibal didn’t care: Hannibal encouraged him to be whatever he felt like being from day to day. Hannibal had bought him the dress.

The other exotic blooms Hannibal had gifted him with were loosely folded in drawers--scraps of silk and lace, things held together with slender straps, things which barely contained him when aroused. To these Will added his own more humble offerings, brought with him from home for the weekend--printed cotton briefs, a couple of pairs of jeans, an oversize shirt which could double as a dress, a sloppy sweater.

Once his clothes were stored away and his makeup bag placed in the bathroom next door, he was finished. Everything else already had a home here--phone charger in the nightstand, toothbrush by the sink, weekend reading on the coffee table. Will had slotted into Hannibal’s life as easy as winking. Sometimes he thought he should feel more surprised about that. From the outside they appeared mismatched, with more than twenty years between them and Hannibal’s elegant urbanity at odds with Will’s almost perverse rusticism. But both urbanity and rusticism were a ruse--honest ones, but a ruse still. Neither of them fit in; their tastes were a declaration of difference, and in their difference they were the same.

Back down the stairs he went, and into the kitchen again. But Hannibal held up a hand, halting Will in his tracks before he could come any closer.

Hannibal pointed towards the leather armchair in the corner. “You’d better sit there for a while,” he said. “Nothing to be concerned about--you’ll understand why in a minute.”

Will frowned. Something was tugging on his mind, right at the back of his brain. It came to him when he sat down--the smell he couldn’t place, hiding beneath the lamb and the spices. He realised what it was at exactly the same time as Hannibal spoke.

“I stopped taking my suppressants,” he said. “The last was yesterday morning.”

“Um,” Will said. “Excuse me?”

Read here on AO3

(Also, here is my ko-fi - I haven't spoken about this on here yet but I'm a fledgling writer and am hoping to provide a much better way for people to support me soon (with rewards! and queer porn!). But in the meantime you can buy me a coffee if you wish!)

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Travel without travelling

2019-03-24T18:54:26Z

I had a birthday recently and my wonderful gf figured out that we could go glamping in a tiny, very cute little cabin barely three miles away from home. Wonderful, spectacular news! Like, fanfares and fireworks, showers of glitter! This is super important, guys. I can go on holiday and not have to travel.

On rare occasions, travel is something I quite like doing for the sake of it - where The Journey Itself is part of the holiday and I have time and headspace to sit back and enjoy it. What I absolutely hate is having to bend my precious holiday time to fit an early morning/late evening flight schedule or the rush to catch a train in the middle of the London rush hour (which takes up so much of the day it's almost unavoidable). I hate, hate, hate the pointless stress of it - eating when you can and even then not what you would normally eat, trying to decide if you should make a last trip to bathroom now or gamble that the one on the plane/train won't be occupied/disgusting. Dragging all your stuff around with you, worrying about if it'll fit into the no-doubt totally inadequate baggage space. OTHER PEOPLE, also trying to navigate their way through all this. It's usually only a necessary evil, one I want to forget as soon as possible.

So what a life hack this little cabin has turned out to be! Set back into some of the ancient woodland which my part of London has managed to hang onto, super-quiet and peaceful, surrounded by trees and people who were very genuinely Not From Around Here (seriously, we were on site for two minutes and someone walking past smiled and said hello). And my local woods - which I've become extremely attached to - right there, but seen from a slightly different angle. We went for walks, read books all afternoon, sat out on the decking in the dark. Woke up to squirrels playing on the roof.

I am definitely going back :)

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Hibernation, RDC5, and Quicksilver...

2019-03-06T19:27:59Z

So I forgot I need to hibernate in January, and then RDC5 happened so I got con flu. Then I started work on a big writing project and now I'm finally back here again.

That's the short version, anyway.

Idk if it's January itself or all end-of-the-year reflection smashing into the new-year-new-you-ACHIEVE rhetoric, but I need to become a complete hermit until I feel ready to enter the world again. COMPLETE. HERMIT. Everything needs to be cosy and quiet and, most importantly, s-l-o-w. I avoid doing anything which isn't strictly necessary, including talking to people I usually like very much. If I had a cabin in the woods, I'd pack up and move there for the whole month. But I don't so I had to make do with keeping the door locked, the curtains closed, only reading and watching things I've read and watched before, and barely using my phone. Also homemade bramble whisky.

But it worked it's magic, as it always does every year, and I bounced straight into February and RDC5. If you've never been under the same roof as hundreds of fannibals for three days at a time, I highly recommend it - it contains some crazy levels of energy. Hardened cynics become stalwarts of positivity under its thrall. Everyone you meet is a potential friend for life. In fact, when you meet new people introductions are rarely made as they don't matter - you already understand each other on such a fundamental level that names have no meaning (which is why you can often hear someone shrieking "omg you're so-and-so???" after they've been happily talking for an hour).

Also, all the hugging and flower crowns and gift-giving and antlers make you look like exactly like a cult - seeing the freaked-out faces of the normal guests is well worth the price of admission.

This year it was extra-crowded and much hotter than usual (different hotel - the aircon in the other is freezing and I packed accordingly :/ ). Mads was as genuine, gracious and giving as I'd expected him to be (I went with some friends to see him at LFCC a couple of years ago) - getting photos and autos (especially photos) is always awkward and weird, but he's so good at putting you at ease I'd recommend it to anyone usually nervous of that kind of thing. Richard was less sure about the con experience but I think he was somewhat won round by the end. Sadly we were robbed of a Q&A with them both - no opportunity to quiz them about the TWOTL fight :(

The best surprise (for me, others were better informed) was Jeremy Davies - such a delightful, wonderful human being. I could listen to him talk for hours. And he immediately understood the fannibal vibe, to the point of joining our ranks and referring to us all (himself included) as a 'wonderful, misfit family'. Everyone cried (I can't explain it, you just had to be there, similarly sleep-deprived and/or overstimulated).

Almost immediately after, I came down with con flu (which this time I was grateful for, as others came down with pneumonia!!) and, as soon as I recovered, I started my next big writing project - Quicksilver: The Novel is the working title :)

So that brings me up to date! It's nice to be back and feel like I've caught up - I really would like to make a habit out of posting on here. It's difficult juggling three main platforms but I'll keep trying to make it work. My next post will probably be about my progress with Quicksilver - should anyone have any questions (as we've had to near-abandon the tumblr blog) I'll happily take them here.

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Fic: Words, Will/Hannibal

2018-12-20T21:05:04Z

Beatricenius is entirely to blame for this - I wasn't planning on writing anything but then something happened on twitter and I had to :0

It's been a long time since I wrote pure PWP but I think I needed to let out off some steam after the past couple of weeks!

Rating: Explicit
Pairing: Will Graham/Hannibal Lecter
Tags: Dirty Talk, Anal Fingering, Fingerfucking, Cock Warming, Blow Jobs, Creampie, Come as Lube, Come Swallowing, Dom/sub Undertones, Wet & Messy, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot
Summary:

Hannibal was often silent, Will had learned. He talked just as much as ever--if not more--outside of the bedroom. They had so much time now and they filled it with talk. But here it was different. Here Hannibal didn’t want to use his gift of words.

And the less he spoke, the more vocal Will was. And the things that he said were quite… well. Unexpected.

Will and Hannibal enjoy some dirty talk :)

Warnings: if you find someone being called a slut during sex triggering at all I suggest you avoid this one.

Excerpt below the cut | Read on ao3

( Read more... )

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Some self-reccing - the Hannibal edition

2018-12-17T18:12:39Z

I've got little to rescue from tumblr which isn't fic, and the best way I could think of putting some of that on here was a 'best of' self-rec post. I posted something similar on pillowfort so apologies if I'm essentially spamming you on multiple platforms- makes it feel more like home to have my fic on here. Just think of them as scatter cushions :)

( Read more... )

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settling in

2018-12-11T16:57:28Z

For the first time in over a week, I actually feel quite positive! Got my theme sorted, started moving bits of my online life away from tumblr and onto other platforms, and ready to meet some new people (as well as finding old ones)! What happened last Monday has proved to be the most awful, disruptive shock - it's been a lot of work (a lot of emotional work too) but I think I can see potential for some good things to come out of it.

I don't really want to get into my feelings about what's happening on tumblr on here as I'm finding this place to be a welcome respite - my blog there is one giant ragepost and I plan to just walk away from it after Dec 12th. Just know I consider it all to be A Very Bad Thing - not just for fandom, but for everybody.

Anyway, onwards we go. I've better things to spend my energy on, the new year is coming, and maybe it'll bring us some good news for a change.

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a post-tumblr user

2018-12-05T18:35:17Z

Following tumblrgeddon I'm shipping out and seeking a new safe harbour. I'm on twitter and pillowfort too (same username) and over the next couple of weeks I'll slowly be building up my accounts.

For anyone who doesn't know me, I'm a fic writer, primarily in the Hannibal fandom (same name on ao3 as well) *waves*

I'm also a total noob at this so please bear with me lol. I may be """"old""" for a fangirl but I was only ever a lurker on LJ/DW and it seems like I have a lot to learn in a very short amount of time!

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